I have been like a zapped power outage for a long time, unable to function well and do the job I thought I was meant to do. After much prayer and introspection over the last few years, I realized I was no longer carrying the yolk I was meant to. My burden was anything but light and easy. Slowly the Lord has shown me something very ugly about myself that I have been very reluctant to uncover--This has been about my pride. My I’m-going-to-do-this-even-if-it-kills-me-pride. My I’m-going-to-do-this-no-matter-what-pride. This-is-the-superior-choice-pride.
Oh, I was never that bold to say those things or even consciously think them, but the attitude was there trying to micromanage and creating a family
Surely I am not the only one who has suffered with this; after all, pride is the root of all evil. Here are a few questions to ask yourself and keep your pride in check. Really ponder these because on the surface may seem not to apply but once you probe deeply, you may unearth a fossil of pride.
1. Is homeschooling about me? Ultimately, homeschooling needs to be about what is best for the family. It should not be something to stroke mom (or dads) ego or a measuring stick for our holiness.
2. Do I trust God to protect my children? This was a doozy for me. I have a difficult time trusting and coupled with my control freak nature, I stared this one in the face and reluctantly admitted that when it got down to it, I didn’t trust Him with my children.
3. Do I think I am in control of how my children turn out? As a young mother, I thought homeschooling was some kind of insurance policy for holy kids but come to find out, the salesman ripped me off.
4. Do I think it is a sin if families choose other educational choices for their children? I never would have admitted this one to myself, but I did tout a superior attitude about homeschooling and felt it was the only viable option for Christian families.